Supporting a Child with ADHD

Many parents struggle when supporting a child or youth who has been diagnosed with ADHD. This specific topic is special to my heart due to being diagnosed with ADHD at age 9. I was blessed to have appropriate support and accommodations put in place to help me feel successful. I wanted to spend some time exploring some tips and strategies for supporting these wonderful youth in their day-to day lives.,

  Some common struggles children with ADHD have are:

• Forgetfulness: many parents must tell their child multiple times to do, or remember something, only to have the child still forget.
• Impulsivity: another challenge for these children and youth is that they can react impulsively without thinking. This could lead them to do or say something they may later regret.
• Inconsistency: I have heard many parents say “but yesterday was wonderful. They did all their chores and homework without being asked”, only for the next day to have nothing done. It is common for these children and youth to react inconsistently to similar situations. This inconsistency can lead many parents to believe “my child is doing this on purpose” or “they are manipulative”, meanwhile the youth could be trying their best every day.
• Socialization: As children and youth get older, the social environments in which they engage in become more complex. Some youth with ADHD may struggle to make and maintain friendships due to missing or misunderstanding social cues. This can be heartbreaking to see as a parent.

  These are just a few of the challenges that children, youth and parents may be facing on a day-to-day basis. Below I want to outline some strategies that can be implemented to support your loved one with these skills.

 

1. Routine and Structure: When supporting kids whose brains can be all over the place, having a consistent routine can be helpful. This way their brain can learn what is expected from them each day. They will probably need more reminders and prompts than other children. I would also say that visual schedules posted in a place the frequently visit can also be helpful. It may also be helpful to ask them to complete one task at a time, versus an entire list. Some children may forget or not comprehend multiple tasks being presented at once.
2. Clear Expectations and Consequences: Kids with ADHD do well when there is clear expectations and consequences. It’s important to make sure that the consequence matches the size of the behaviour. For example, if they do not take the trash out, an appropriate punishment might be that they cannot get something they want (going to a friend’s house, their tablet, etc.) until the chore is done, versus taking away the tablet for an entire week. Some language that is encouraged to use is “first insert the task you want them to do, then insert their desired activity”. For example, you may say “first you need to finish the dishes, and then we can go to park”. It’s important that the consequences are also followed through with. If a parent does not follow through with a consequence they outlined, it can teach the child that consequences aren’t likely to happen (meaning they can continue to do what they prefer to do).
3. Taking breaks: people with ADHD have an especially hard time completing tasks they do not enjoy. This is due to the way their brain releases dopamine (the happiness chemical). This also helps explain why people with ADHD can hyperfocus on something they do enjoy. When doing tasks they do not enjoy, it can be helpful to take scheduled breaks. For example, after doing 15-20 minutes of homework they may need a 5-minute movement or brain break.
4. Mindfulness: mindfulness is the skill of learning to be in the present moment. Being present can be difficult for people with ADHD due to their brain easily zoning out or moving quickly. Overtime, children and youth can practice mindfulness activities that focus on doing one thing at a time and paying attention to what is happening around them. This skill has many benefits as it can help with impulsivity, staying on task, and socialization. Mindfulness helps them learn to stop and pay attention before acting. There are many resources that can help children learn mindfulness through games, art and videos.
5. Try to limit distractions: When trying to complete a task, it can be helpful to try and limit the number of distractions in the area. When trying to get a child or youth to complete homework, it may be advised to remove electronics or toys from the area.
6. Focus on the superpowers of having ADHD: Many children and youth may feel different or as if they are a burden for this diagnosis. It can be helpful to focus on the good qualities ADHD can have on someone, such as being creative, outgoing, and caring. This can help our children understand that although their brain works differently and they may need support in some areas, they are still capable of achieving the things they want.

If you’re child has ADHD it can bring up many emotions for parents. These are just a few of the many strategies. If you have any questions or strategies you would like to add, please add them in the comments below.